An Unconventional Christmas...

...seems in order because plans for Christmas day are not taking the shape we'd hoped for this year.. We includes my son, the oldest child, and his girlfriend who are visiting from Austin, Texas, and my daughter who has recently relocated to Nashville, Tennessee from Orlando, Florida. She has recently broken up with her boyfriend of over a year, thus the move to start anew.

I might interject here that both my children and my son's girlfriend worked at Disney in Florida through the college internship program for over a year each. That is where my son and his girlfriend met, so his move from there to Texas was to be with her. After the move, he attended The University of Texas in Austin. Both graduated from college and have their respective jobs. She is a skilled, bilingual elementary school teacher, and he is a studio art major with three different jobs which accommodate his varied interests and talents in the arts, including one job on the University campus which keeps him in touch with professors he admires and the world of art on a collegiate level.

My daughter is still pursuing her education, and has attended three different schools. One of her many majors, because she too is multi-talented, which makes it difficult to choose one to follow, includes voice and piano. Her most recent major is nursing. Among the many roles she played at Disney, she also utilized her talent in acting. Prior to her move, she bought a guitar, which seems fitting if you sing and are moving to Nashville, and hopes to learn to play it. She met a guy while in Florida, who was not part of the 'Disney Family', but a pilot from NYC, living in Orlando. They were together over a year, and as I stated before, they have recently broken up. He's a great guy, and still a friend of our family; however, this preceded her move.

I am the mom, post-divorce, to these kids. This is my second Christmas as a divorcee'. Last year the kids and their 'significant others' joined me in Orlando, and we celebrated the holidays together at Disney, since my daughter was not coming home, because her work schedule required her to be there for Christmas day. This year I'd hoped we would have our 'traditional Christmas' together at home, once again, and we've made great efforts to pull it off. But as always with the best of intentions, things are not going according to plans.

For starters, my son and his girlfriend were up all night Saturday packing before they were to arrive the next day. They made it as far as Cincinnati on Sunday, but both fell asleep while waiting for their connecting flight. They were scheduled to arrive here at 11:45 a.m., but were resechduled for 5:30 p.mish. This meant they began their journey wasting hours sitting in the airport. The girlfriend was feeling sick by the time they arrived here, and she has gradually gotten worse each day since then, and spent hours in the emergency room last night, despite the fact that she'd begun taking antibiotics and other meds to counter this. While there her eardrum burst from infection, and she is spending most of her time in bed.

In the meantime, my daughter has had her share of concerns. She has a new job, and Monday, on day four of work, she called from her jeep to say she was dizzy and not feeling well. After our conversation, she decided to call her new boss to explain she should not go to work but to the doctor instead. She went home, feeling miserable, and gave into the illness for a couple of days before seeing the doctor yesterday. It seems the dizziness is caused by an inner ear problem, so she, too, is being treated for the same. She also has another issue that concerns her and will need some attention.

A few months ago she discovered a lump in her breast. She is young, so she'd not had a routine check with a doctor for this before. She came home for an appointment with my breast care surgeon ( yes, there is a family history of breast cancer and other related concerns on my side), and learned that she has a benign tumor called a fibroadenoma. We were told it's not something to worry about, but still requires a close check from time to time. Well, now it seems she has two new tumors on the other side, and needs to visit with the doctor again when she is home to determine if they are the same type tumor as the other one.

Before she began her job, she'd intended to come home for a couple of weeks to a month to regroup in the aftermath of the many decisions she'd coped with over the past few months. The job offer she took came as a sudden surprise, and one she felt she could not refuse, so now she has only a long weekend for Christmas. Somehow we are going to have to determine what is most significant, and deal with it accordingly. Hopefully, her employees value her enough to accommodate her needs at this time.

So...this is where we are today. I have lost tremendous amounts of sleep since last Sunday, and because I have fibromyalgia with a tendency to have migraines as a result, I am suffering with a headache today, and have taken to my bed. The tree is still in a box, as are many of the decorations. Fortunately, a good friend helped me take things out of the attic last Saturday, and we hung the garland on the rails to the stairs. I've managed to display a few of my decorations, but overall, I have done very little. The majority of gifts are all piled in a room unwrapped, and the ones that need to be mailed are in my bedroom here, on the floor in disarray. Clearly they won't arrive before Christmas Day. Heck, we'll be lucky to have anything completely ready for then. When my daughter arrives, there will be a houseful of mostly sick people, and I'm wondering how we are going to pull off the 'traditional Christmas' I'd hoped to provide.

As my son and I drove from place to place today purchasing medicaton from the pharmacy and food to comfort a sick person, we made a decision of sorts. I want to preface the decision by saying that in making it, I'm finding that accomplishing what I'd hoped seems a little less daunting, and perhaps it will happen after all, but if not, this new plan is stellar!!

My son is talented in video art and photography. He's had work shown at Christie's in NYC, and has won awards for several of his artistic pieces. So while I waited in the car, wearing my pajamas with an overcoat covering them, I had this 'light-blub' idea/moment. I decided we should forget the traditional plans, and have ourselves an 'unconventional Christmas', and utilize his skills to document it! We'll video the attempts to decorate, by filming the boxes lying around the house that contain decorations. We'll document it all...each failed attempt, the good intentions, and sigh and let it go!! We'll video the gifts piled in the spare guest bedroom, and perhaps we will just forage through them guessing which ones belong to whom, and dispense of them in this manner. We'll feast on the 'tradtional chicken soup' I prepared for those who are sick. I thought we should purchase and watch that movie about the family who decided to skip the traditional celebration, and go on a cruise instead. I think it was called 'Christmas With The Kranks' (?) with Tim Allen and Jamie Lee Curtis. This would seem appropriate. (Despite their attempts to skip everything traditional, the Kranks found themselves at home with family celebrating exactly as they always do, but with new insight and vision.) Perhaps by accepting that it is okay to create this kind of holiday, we'll also feel free to accomplish what we can and let the rest go, and enjoy the outcome!

I know that already I feel a tremendous sense of relief by giving myself permission to go with the flow, to accept the things that are beyond my control, and embrace life as it is being presented to me today! I think this idea of an 'unconventional Christmas' may prove to be the best idea I've had in a long time!! :))

(Note to self: With your newly acquired skills in posting links and pics, create links later to the significant info in this blog!!) :))

P.S. My daughter just called and brought tears to my eyes by sharing what I consider to be the best gift of all (appropriately shared for the holidays)!!!! She's been working on the words and music to a new song, and she called to sing the completed version to me!! I LOVE these moments!! I LIVE for these moments!! May you all receive such equally wonderful gifts this season!!! :))