'Rainy Days and Mondays'
There are sights, sounds, and scents that frame our memories. I awoke this morning to one of them...I heard rain outside my bedroom window. While my aching joints provide one feeling, along with a sense of reality, my mind takes me back to a time when I was six years old. Momentarily, I am there again, but my mind races ahead to the 'to do list' I composed in my head last night before falling asleep. Today, I'm thinking it's a cruel thing to do to one's self before retiring, if a peaceful sleep is sought, so I put it aside.
As I resume the memory, I open the door, leading to the deck, and take a deep breath. Ahh!! I breathe in the fresh smell, and become aware of the feeling in the air that beckons me back to that day many years ago. Both the scent and the sight, permeate my body, awakening all of my senses. I close my eyes and listen for a moment, breathe....ahh...I want to stay in that place in time forever, a place where life felt secure, in a time before I knew it could be anything but safe...in a place where time seemed to stand still, kind of like this moment...a place where I would 'want' time to stand still.
Looking out, I realize another season of my life has arrived. I take a picture, in my mind's eye, then with my camera (I've captured photos of two other seasons and placed them here, so it seems fitting). And then, the words to a haunting melody come to mind...framing yet another time in my life, another season.
In that time, I am a young 'woman' away at college, transported from the shelter of the elementary school basement, where the bus driver deposited my classmates and I, on yet another rainy day, to my university dorm room. Simultaneously, as each of the spaces become clearer, then vivid and sharply focused in my mind's eye, snap (!!), I feel myself surrounded by those places once again. My chest seems to literally expand, my body feels as if it has become enlarged. The years span before me, and the memories carry me from one place to another, and back again, to this very moment.
I want to alter the words of the song playing in my mind just now, give them new meaning perhaps. In 'this place' I have the power, right? 'Rainy days and Mondays always'....take me back (to a place, back to a memory, where life was everything I want to embrace today)....
This day is a memory 'in the making'...and I am keenly aware of the significance of my ability to create.....
There are sights, sounds, and scents that frame our memories. I awoke this morning to one of them...I heard rain outside my bedroom window. While my aching joints provide one feeling, along with a sense of reality, my mind takes me back to a time when I was six years old. Momentarily, I am there again, but my mind races ahead to the 'to do list' I composed in my head last night before falling asleep. Today, I'm thinking it's a cruel thing to do to one's self before retiring, if a peaceful sleep is sought, so I put it aside.
As I resume the memory, I open the door, leading to the deck, and take a deep breath. Ahh!! I breathe in the fresh smell, and become aware of the feeling in the air that beckons me back to that day many years ago. Both the scent and the sight, permeate my body, awakening all of my senses. I close my eyes and listen for a moment, breathe....ahh...I want to stay in that place in time forever, a place where life felt secure, in a time before I knew it could be anything but safe...in a place where time seemed to stand still, kind of like this moment...a place where I would 'want' time to stand still.
Looking out, I realize another season of my life has arrived. I take a picture, in my mind's eye, then with my camera (I've captured photos of two other seasons and placed them here, so it seems fitting). And then, the words to a haunting melody come to mind...framing yet another time in my life, another season.
In that time, I am a young 'woman' away at college, transported from the shelter of the elementary school basement, where the bus driver deposited my classmates and I, on yet another rainy day, to my university dorm room. Simultaneously, as each of the spaces become clearer, then vivid and sharply focused in my mind's eye, snap (!!), I feel myself surrounded by those places once again. My chest seems to literally expand, my body feels as if it has become enlarged. The years span before me, and the memories carry me from one place to another, and back again, to this very moment.
I want to alter the words of the song playing in my mind just now, give them new meaning perhaps. In 'this place' I have the power, right? 'Rainy days and Mondays always'....take me back (to a place, back to a memory, where life was everything I want to embrace today)....
This day is a memory 'in the making'...and I am keenly aware of the significance of my ability to create.....
posted by Di at 10:16 AM
3 Comments:
I hope that your reverie was not totally one of "the blues". So often for me, rainy days are for settling.....there really isn't much else you can do on them but relax: Lawn is too wet to mow, travel is a pain, and more dangerous to boot. Coffee and a good book are in order.
A sad reminder too, "The Carpenters" song.
My heart breaks when I think of Karen, and how she must have yearned for someone to love her, just as she was. Instead, she was driven to low self esteem by parents, and others around her.
"Sometimes I'd like to quit".......
Could things have been different if she had just one TRUE friend? Someone about whom she could have said, "It's nice to know somebody loves me"?
I've read that smell is one of the strongest memory triggers. The smell of a stable, a locker room, rain......all so distinctive and pleasant in their own way, can bring memories flooding in.
A well written post, Di, filled with mixed emotions.
Beautiful pictures. Thanks for the transport.
Thanks, GB, my 'faithful friend'....always good at making my posts much more than they began....
A, in the third photo, did you find the hidden bird? There was some debate if what I see is really a bird, but I zoomed in with a feature on my camera, and indeed it seems to be. The question is whether or not it's 'Tapper' or some mystery bird!! What do you think?!
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